Thursday, December 1, 2011

Seadanya... being the operative word

A conversation occured just now in a session in ustazah pilihan when the finalists went to thailand and interviewed a few couples who got married there for various reasons... (words slightly changed, i can't remember the exact words they said):
"Finalist ustazah: jadinya kenapa anda berdua berkahwin di sini, tidak di malaysia?
Lelaki: isteri pertama saya tak bagi.
(he was suspiciously young, probably still in midtwenties).
Perempuan: ibu bapa saya x restu. Kami dah berkawan 7 tahun, tapi mereka x tau kami menjalankan hubungan yang serius. Bila kami nak kahwin, mereka x bg. Apatah lagi bila mereka tau dia dah beristeri.
Finalist ustazah: apa perancangan kamu nanti? Adakah akan terus merahsiakan perkahwinan ini?
Perempuan: kami akan bagitau, slow2 pada ibu bapa. Saya nak family saya terima suami saya 'seadanya'."
Seadanya. The word sounds simple enough, thrown in so commonly in conversations, i don't think people saying it even know what it really means.
'aku sayang dia, aku rela terima dia seadanya'.
'aku harap family aku boleh terima dia seadanya. Aku sayang sangat kat dia walaupun dia jahat macam tu'.
What does it really mean, anyway?
Seadanya atau untuk dienglishkan, accepting he/she as he/she is. Romantically viewed as loving someone so great you accept everything about him/her, flaws and goodness all in one.
But, in view of above situations, i personally think that being that romantic, using the word 'seadanya' operatively, can cause your life, blind you with witless passion and turn your back on your own parents, whose blessings are His Blessings. And so, when you turn your back on our Creator's Blessings, what will you get in your life?
I'm afraid it will be nothing but suffering and corruptions of both, marriage and family institutions, which happen so commonly nowadays, it's frightening.
Think about that before you say words so easily said without actual meaning. Choose wisely the words to say, choose wisely who do you want to spend the rest of your life with. Think. That's all i ask. Wallahualam.

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